To Sn, Tj and Tn......

Disclaimer: A very senti post ahead. Donot read unless you are tj, sn or tn or totally jobless!


“You realize the value of things only after losing them”.
This is almost like saying that the sun rises in the east. I can think of n number of situations when this one line has haunted me. This time as well, I thought about it a couple of days back, after reading this.
Yes, its true that I haven’t LOST as in LOST you guys, I know that you are always gonna be there for me, without fail, and all those things about distance not effecting our friendship is true and stuff….still…

I totally agree with Sn on this and I am very sorry for being SO caught up in my life that I wasn’t able to be the friend I should have been. I can very well identify with the feeling of wanting to have “people who know you” around you. Its just one of those times when you feel like just sitting with someone (maybe not even saying much) but knowing the other person will understand you. It’s about situations when you look at something, then look at each other and burst out laughing even though there wasn’t anything quite funny about the whole thing. All those times, when you just look at each other with a wicked smile and a teasing look in the eye which says it all (it actually says much more than words.). All those code names (remember Theta, epu, psi, gamma(OMG!!), monkey, the CG hunting, the mathematical group???) and all that nudging. I know I don’t need to give you explanations for what I have done( bcoz you understand it better than I myself do). I don’t have to think twice before telling you guys anything. It’s when those tears just fall off your eyes but you don’t feel embarrassed of them.

I do this with the new friends I have made here. It may not be that good or it might be even better. But it’s definitely not the same.
So listen…I DON’T care how busy you keep.I agree with Sn on this and even I want updates from you. NOW!!!



p.s. Thankz Sn. Loved your post.

Lot has happened over the past few weeks. Um even more close to my exams and I don’t know what um doing (definitely NOT studying). It’s very weird when people, who meet me, keep hinting that I look anything but a student whose going to appear for her BOARD exams in less than 3 weeks. The weird part about is that I know that I should be feeling guilty but I actually don’t feel anything. It is as if I’ve become immune to everything. That ive been acting like a zombie since the past few days, is another story all together.

Another new development is the fact that me and tj have been like big pillars of support for each other since the past few days. Both of us keep inspiring each other to study. Dunno how much good it has done.Tj must have developed "lasha phobia" thankz to all the trouble that i've been giving her. Still…for a person like me, who needs to be motivated hundreds of time each minute, things haven’t been easy. Every bit of help is most welcome specially when out of the blue, things that have been buried far outta sight, reappear.

Also, of late I have been doing things that I enjoy doing, rather than do things which I should be doing. I’ve been busy sketching, listening to music and helping my parents in one of their projects, which has given me a great opportunity to actually discover what I like doing and stuff that I am good at.

SRK has been doing a great job on KBC (though “some” people may not quite agree with me:P) I miss no episode of it. I simply love has dry, sarcastic, typical “Scorpio” wit (okay tj…stop flying babes) I feel its very wrong of people to compare him to Big B. both of them have their own style and approach towards the game. And you have to agree he gave that he gave that teacher from “jeend” a good one by going and giving her mother the cheque, instead of giving it to her. What an attitude she had!!!

Thankfully, Coffee with Karan has again started. I use to watch it religiously in my 10^th STD. Its kinda fun to watch. Atleast better than those “saas-bahu” serials, where the protagonist dies n number of times, gets married 2n times and is betrayed 3n times.

Finally….i dunno when I’ll be able to put up my next post and I dunno WHAT I’ll be putting up as my next post, but I serioualy hope I don’t have to put up the thing I think I will have to put up as my next post. So basically, since um losing my head and writing all rubbish, I think I should wrap up and concentrate on the chemy exam that I have tomorrow. (yeah!!! What a waste of valentine’s day. *sob sob*)

MISCELLENOUS

*Yawn!!!*…. This is precisely what I’ve been feeling since the past few days. Ive become a big lazy-bone and feel like doing absolutely nothing. Ive been sleeping like a log. Nothing happening in the study field as well.( I know sn and tj will definitely erupt into a huge round of protests, reading this, but c’mon guyz…even I have the right to put my feet up and do nothing for a change.)Winter… the culprit behind this. Who in there right mind would ever wanna come out of da beautiful world of deep slumber??

Also…I must confess that the increasing number of combined classes, with tj and sn, that i seem to be having at my tutorial, has really spoilt me. I mean, its not my fault. Um da only girl in a class of 27 guys. Now…though I might be in quite an envious postion for some of my friends*ahem*, it gets really bugging at times. No one to talk to and specially giggle….lol!!!! but since my wishes are being granted pretty often these days, I have been having the pleasure of tolerating some really pathetic classes, in the company of my friends. I mean, its not the teachers fault dat he wat he teaches is boring right???? So the pic u can c is wat we do to stop ourselves from falling asleep….

. well….this is just a mere trailer of what we do ( i.e sn,tj and myself…duh!!!) . it shows a tabular representation of our mental condition on Wednesdays, when we have a 3 hour maths class. Next to the table u can see all thetas and psi and eppu drawn. We’ve got to do something to keep ourselves alive, right??? tj has got a full copy devoted to all this. Its our life saver. we keep writing whatever we wanna say and keep passing it between the three of us. Me and tj use to do this at our school also…he!!he!!! good old days!!!!!

Guyz….tell me something. Is my handwriting that bad??? The pic u can see on the left, is that of a paragraph written in my handwriting. Okay… I think I can increase the height of my alphabets a bit, but otherwise I think my writing is pretty decent. Wat say???? But, English prof at my college doesn’t agree with me. I had gone to him, along with sn, to see my English marks. I got pretty decent marks. And as he stood there giving us tips on how we can improve our marks, he curtly pointed out,” you need to improve your handwriting. Maybe then , I will increase the number of marks I give you.” Not fair!!!!!!


Damn my comp!!!!! it just automatically shuts down as soon as I get connected to the net. Finally!!! It decided to take pity on me and last long enough for me to post this. As it is , I have had a “superb” *sarcy look* morning. Had to see the face of my tutorials center head whom we’ve christened “yamraj”. Look at his gall!!! Agreed that people cant seem to pronounce my name properly. Abhildasaaa, avilassssa, aubhildasa, abhipsa, avilipsa …. These are just a few of the various forms that my name has taken. But today was the height. “yamraj” calls up one of the teachers to find out if he’s free to take our class in the evening, and in course of the conversation says- “ sir …. woh ….. gupta ,aur aur ek do jan puch rahe hain ki aaj aap class le payenge???”
Gupta??????? * horrified !!!! bewildered*
Me: sir!!!! MY NAME IS “NOT” GUPTA!!!!!!
Yamraj: oh!!! Whatever!!!
I gave him a disgusted look and stormed outta his room.
I don’t know what else I will have to tolerate!!!! God bless me!!!!

BLACK TUESDAY

Well!! i dont really think dat dis is da best way to start one's first post, on one's first attempt to blog(no, actually second.lol), but well...dats wat iam!! Actually...this is wat prompted me to start blogging (oops!!sorry... "reblogging") . so i guess its best to write bout it...so here it goes...
Actually, before plunging into the story, it will b better to tell u guyz dat iam a total capricorn. Yep... my friends will too gladly vouch for dat. From my "wierd moodswinds" to my obsession with stuff, um a capri to da hilt. No..actually i may be having a bit of my ascendent's influence..(Gawd!!snehudi..wont u b pleased!!) Anyways...so...its bout yestrday. u know, sometimes u go through these wierd phases in ur life when nothing seems to go right for u. well!! this had been happening with me for quite sometime. But yesterday took da cake. I went through an alchemy of emotions.
I woke very happy and all ready to face a new day, still rejuvinated by my previous evening's(thats monday) dandia-dancing(p.s. i simply luuuuv dancing. any form of it. Just music n me....) Though initially i was quite skeptical bout going for the the dance, coz i didnt want to miss my tutorial classes...(okay!! no need to roll ur eyes... i told u i was a typical capricorn), my passion for dance took the better of me.lolz.... so i did go and enjoyed myself throughly... The icing on da cake was when i came to know that nothing much had been done in class and the teacher had only done t.p.(time pass !!) I couldnt believe my luck.. All of a sudden i started feeling the festive spirit around me and practically waltzed my way into the evening. That was when my bubble of happiness was ruthlessly punctured . As usual i went for my tutorial classes in da evening(remind me to dedicate a whole post to it and tell u bout the people n things that happen there. on second thoughts, one post wont b enough to completely describe the atrocious functioning of the management and da wierd people present there) Anyways.. as usual me, along with snehudi n tejudi(my gr8 friends and life-savers at the insti. thats bcoz am da only girl admist 27 guys in my batch!!) were having our usual in-da-corridor chat wen one of da teacher who teaches us chemy beckoned me and started to congratulate me on winning the chemistry Olympiad. Man... i was bewildered.. not bcoz i had won it, but bcoz i had not even appeared for it. When i told him this, he couldnot believe it. He said," what?? u didnot even appear?? and here i was knowing that u would have definitely done well at it.." Man... it was perhaps the one of the most dissapointing moments of my life. I know that i might b making a huge issue outta nothing, but trust me,hurting people who believe in me is one of my worst fears.
Well... this was not it. it could just be called the beginning. The entire 45 mins of his class,he kept expressing his disappointment. How i passed time is something that i cant express. I felt like burying myself somewhere and not emerging out till that teacher underwent a memory transplant. anyways. Before the next class started (and that was almost immediately coz da next teacher, also a chemy one, dosent waste time jumping from one class to the other.. oops!! i hope he doesnt come across this. lolz..)the guy whom i had asked whether anything had been taught the previous day, nicely tells me that sir had only taught a bit of nomenclature. Before i could register the shock of not coming prepared to class and worst still, realizing that that guy had had the guts to lie to me,the teacher walked in. And lo behold!! He had also developed a sudden urge to test us on what he had taught the previous day. As a gave him bewildered looks,hoping he would take pity on me, i realized that i had no other option but to answer that test and face the humiliation. So i went ahead with it and answered what ever i could using my common sence.( yes tejudi nd snehudi, i have loads of it unlike wat u think. huh!!!) Though i managed to do better than wat i expected... i had further dissapointment to face. That was when i realized that my answers to a compitative exam which i had appeared for, the prevoius sunday were all terribly wrong. That was it... i couldnt bear it.
I spent the rest ofthe evening(whatever of it was left) brooding over the events of the day. Till now i havent been able to figure where i went wrong. Iam a very dissapointed and frusrated person at present. Again i have been proved thats all fair in love and war(i.e; if u call academic compitition a war). I simply dont know where to go from here. i have lost all the zeal to enjoy the pujas. All i could think of was to pen (or rather type)my thoughts in the hope that i would be able to get some answers from it(half expecting it to speak to me.. lolz... i guess um hallucinating). Hope that i get some answers by da time i decide to post somthing else. And... that better be soon...